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And have a normal relationship like everyone else. I am having a hard time dealing with these thoughts. I really really like him, more than I’ve liked anyone before. The man I am married to now is a retired preacher and I trus him completely.

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Be kind to yourself and allow yourself time and space to grieve. You may be thinking of the great times you two had together when so young. A piece of the grief can be mourning the people that you used to be. Memory does a funny thing – it glosses over the bad bits and lets us view the past through rose colored glasses.

I’m dating a widower, and I love him very much. But I spent the first year of our relationship walking on eggshells, denying any of my needs so that I could be sensitive to his grief . Profound loss is life changing and the grief that comes with it is everlasting.

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I was not seeking love or a relationship only a companion to go to lunch or dinner with and enjoy deep conversations on any subject. After viewing what happened and so quickly we decided it was our destiny. Meeting, having so much in common, chemistry, likes and dislikes, etc.

The intensity of the emotions one feels after losing a pet are not always congruent with how close this pet was to them, because grief is a fickle process. He stresses that communication is ultimately the most important part of supporting someone that is grieving because it is the best way to gauge what you can do to help them feel better. Being someone’s partner means supporting them through the best of times and the worst of times, and a pet passing on definitely falls into the latter category. Losing a pet can be extremely painful, and if you’re dating someone grieving the loss of their pet, it can feel difficult to know what’s best to say. The truth is, you don’t have to automatically know how to best support your partner when their pet dies, but instead, be willing and ready to support them in the way that they need most. But not everyone was supportive, and at times she struggled with the stigma of starting a new relationship while married.

The communication was huge for both of us. We talked about his late wife many times as I knew her; he loved her and that is why I fell even more for him. I knew he was a good man – dedicated and knew how to be committed to a woman for over 34 years. Today, we have an amazing relationship that feels like we have been together forever. We laugh, joke, cry, talk about everything.

Let him know you want to take it slow. If he’s really in love, that won’t be an issue. I just want to accept and I am trying hard but it is difficult, do you have any suggestions how to work on myself please?

Communicate well when dating a widower

I didn’t say anything immediately but after a few days of struggling with this I told him again how confusing an hurtful this was to me. Now mind you, he and I both by this time had told one another that we loved each other. We both told one another that we were in this 100% and were committed to us and the relationship we started.


I am a widower and my mother is also dating a widower so I can see it from both sides. My mother definitely feels uncomfortable in her new boyfriend’s house because of the photos of his deceased wife. At the same time, I cannot eliminate my wife’s presence from my household. This has to be a compromise worked out between the widower and his new companion. The house should not look like a shrine to his wife, but he has to honor her memory as well.

And a woman that accepts that is fooling herself. Valentine’s Day will be a bit of a challenge. It’s our first Valentine’s Day together, but it’s also his anniversary with his deceased wife. I know he will struggle with juggling grief and the excitement of “US”.

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